Choosing Gifts That Will Give Joy

Gift giving: Is it really the thought that counts?

So I have a secret to share. I have a love-hate relationship with gift guides. It’s so extra! I can’t help but eagerly peruse them when they come out, hopeful that they’ll hold some inspiration for the people on my list that I’m eager to delight. Yet, after flipping through pages and Instagram stories of all of the newfangled gadgets and fancy cookware, I may end up finding one or two gifts. So this year, I contemplated what a joyful gift guide might look like which is why I designed my gift guides the way they are set up. I thought of an intentional approach that I touch on here in order to share how to choose gifts that will bring joy. In this post, I’m sharing some questions to ask and tips that can help you in choosing gifts that will bring joy to everyone on your list.

Here are my tips for choosing gifts that will spark joy:

Tip 1 – Think about the recipient’s lifestyle. Be specific!

Tip 2 – Imagine them using the gift.

Tip 3 – Let go of the end results.

Think About the Recipient’s Lifestyle

As joyful as the holidays are, there’s something about the onset of the gifting season that stirs up a little bit of dread. I agonize about giving gifts and even receiving them – stressing myself out so much that I often end up putting it off and having to do it all last minute. For recovering perfectionists like me, I think choosing gifts creates a feeling of pressure: you want to give that “wow” gift, the one that’s thoughtful and personal, at a price that feels generous without making the receiver feel guilty or obligated. And then how do you make space for it in your house? I’ve had a difficult time letting go of past gifts that I didn’t exactly love and I was plagued by guilt. What if so-and-so saw that their gift wasn’t in my house? Then I realized that was a me problem. How would I feel if my present wasn’t in their house? It’s a sad paradox. The gift-giver wanted to make the recipient happy, but the gifts themselves were making the gift-giver unhappy!

I’ve given gifts that weren’t a hit before. It’s much less pressure if we recognize that the real reason to give a gift is to show we care about someone. A good gift is one that makes the recipient feel cared for, loved, or appreciated.

Now, before I search for a gift, I imagine what would give joy based on the recipient’s lifestyle. I recall specific details about their daily routines, living quarters, and interests: How much space do they have? What activities do they like to do? What objects do they treasure? At the same time, I want to point out that you can’t control how a gift is received. All you can do is have thoughtful intentions.

Imagine Them Using the Gift

When I find an item that I think will complement the recipient’s lifestyle, I imagine them using or holding it. If the vision gives joy, I know I’m on the right track. The item itself doesn’t have to spark joy for me, but having a positive feeling when I picture my loved one using it is always a good sign. Mindset is important – the feelings we have while choosing a gift transfer to the item itself. One thing that great gifts can do is affirm people’s identities, reminding them of something they do well or aspire to. Two questions to ask yourself are:

1. What gives them joy?
2. What could help them find more joy?

Let Go of the End Results

I love to give presents. Giving gifts without expectations or agenda releases both the giver and the receiver from undue pressure. The true purpose of a gift is to be received – whether or not it’s used and loved for years to come is beside the point. Of course, it’s wonderful to select gifts that give joy, but choosing them thoughtfully – as a way to convey our feelings for loved ones – makes for a truly meaningful exchange.

REPEAT AFTER ME: THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A PERFECT GIFT.

In conclusion to choosing gifts

There is no such thing as the perfect gift. As Dr. Seuss said, “It came without ribbons, it came without tags. It came without packages, boxes, or bags … Maybe Christmas he thought doesn’t come from a store, maybe Christmas perhaps means a little bit more.” The real reason we give gifts is to show to give a gift is to show we care about someone. If you follow these 3 tips, there’s no way you can go wrong! Enjoy this holiday season with your loved ones and friends as each day is its own gift!

Love,